queerqueensansa:

postllimit:

mom: hey *dad’s name* oh whoops i mean *brother’s name* oh no *sister’s name* i mean *name of the family goldfish* ah shoot i meant *your name* can you get down here really quick i need something

my dad has literally called me by his own name. 

(Source: postllimit, via tokillthe-mockingjay)

dialupmodem:

tbh if u really think that iphone users are elitists ask ANY nerd why they prefer android n they’ll go on and on for hours, insulting the phone, steve jobs, tim cook, their entire families, everyone that works for apple, the schools they all attended, and their mothers’ lasagna recipes 

(via tokillthe-mockingjay)

"Who were you before they broke your heart"

I don’t remember  (via lovequotesrus)

(Source: she-does-it-well, via ughjessi)

"If you think women are crazy you’ve never had a dude go from hitting on you to literally threatening to kill you in the time it takes you to say “no thanks.”"

Kendra Wells (via belle-de-nuit)

(via misandryad)

(Source: mysharona1987, via ipartyathome)